Another January 17 breezes in and despite the prevailing situation in Nigeria, it is time to celebrate my Mother. I feel blessed that a wonderful woman of unputdownable virtue and unquestionable character is the one I have as a mother, my biological one. Momma's birthday in itself is a reason to celebrate and forget whatever mixed feelings I've had Nigeria for now.
It is a fact that everyone says their mom or dad is the best in the world. I can however say without any contradiction whatsoever that in choosing the best mothers, Iya Seye stands right in front of the queue. I cannot start listing the virtues that make her qualify but I know I am very demanding and I have just been careful not to judge every other based on what Momma is to my Dad, myself and my brothers.
She is the epitome of loyalty, something very scarce in the womenfolk nowadays. Momma is a planner per excellence. When the resources are in excess quantity, she manages it so well that when scarcity comes, you'll never feel it. I know, and can say that about her. She's always ready to give a smile, I mean a big smile.
I have learnt a lot of things from her and every single thing I have learnt has put me in good stead so far. Lessons that I have picked up from her life of sacrifice have been the basis for my way of life. I know times that Momma has sacrificed her happiness to make some people happy. It is from her that I learnt what living for people means. She has always done that with her resources, no matter how little.
I can never explain the level of loyalty she has shown to folks around her. Very loyal to Dad and her friends. I have even had cause to disagree with her on the level of loyalty to folks who are utterly disloyal. She just looks me in the eye, and tells me its a form of investment that has a way of coming back to one. And to be honest, it happens that way in most cases.
I have a very demanding Dad. Momma however takes it on the chin and makes sure she does whatever it is that her husband wants. She never sits when she's not satisfied with things around. She always wants her house neat. She is always putting things in shape and doesn't want things scattered. I learnt from her that even the minute details count.
For example, Momma hates her pot black. I can say with all pride that her kitchen is neat in its own way. She will not rest until it is perfect enough for her. My mother still does her laundries and that of her husband, and if you're washing when she is, she will help you out, in most cases. I get to ask myself what she is made of. A very hardworking woman, even Mother Eve would be proud of her.
So much to say but where do I start? I have said I will celebrate this one-in-a-kind woman while she lives and beyond because she is a rare one-a mother, a sister, a friend. I am short of words Maami and I do not think I can ever say enough, how I feel about you. I'm proud of you Momma, and I love you big time.
My prayers? Not very many. That you'll live long enough to reap all that you have sown. For you to live long enough to see us achieve what you have always dreamt for us. That I will, Yinka will and Nifemi will, marry wives that have all your positive attributes and more. That everything due you, every of your rights, will be delivered to you this year.
You'll age gracefully and in happiness and sound health. All your sacrifices will not be in vain. Right in the very presence of everyone who has written you off shall you rise to heights hitherto unexpected. Iya Seye, Aunty Vic, Sister Sola, igba odun, odun kan o. Happy Birthday Momma. I love you big time; and I love you more everyday. Hugs and kisses Mommaxoxoxoxoxo
Monday, January 16, 2012
Thursday, November 10, 2011
ADIEU PASTOR SAMUEL ADETUNJI OWOYEMI (1930-2011)
I sat down in my office that fateful morning, playing with my phone because I had a little let-off from my normally busy schedule. I was trying to do many things at the same time play some music on my computer, playing game on my phone, doing a few chats with folks and a few other nothings. Impulsively, I scrolled to check the updates on my messenger and I saw a very close friend with sad emoticons, he was asking rhetorically, why do these things happen?
That was some minutes before ten in the morning of September 15. Going further down my contact list, I knew the inevitable had happened. The elephant has fallen; read a display. I knew I had to confirm something somehow. I picked up my phone and dialed and the voice at the other end said what I knew had already happened. The exact word I remember hearing was Baba don die o. I sighed, re-adjusted myself and took a deep breath.
That sums up how I knew about the passing unto glory of a father and an encourager. I have known Pastor Samuel Adetunji Owoyemi, whom we all called Baba Owoyemi right from my childhood. Permit me to get a little emotional with this piece. Baba Owoyemi deserves this and more, for he lived a life that was exemplary. I am struggling to find the right words that would tally with how emotional I feel. I do not feel sad at his exit, I only am going to celebrate this impactful life well-lived.
I have known Baba Owoyemi since my childhood. As a child, I remember he was calm and articulated his points whenever there was anything to discuss. His messages in our old SPAC, St. Pauls Apostolic Church, were not the speaker blaring, altar stamping, grammar blowing ones. Yet they had this way of sinking into ones system.
The Yoruba word kami kami kami is one I heard for the first time, from his mouth. It was in one of his wisdom-laden messages. I was nothing more than seven years old then but by the end of that Sunday service, I knew what kami kami kami meant. He carefully chose his words and had an illustration cum example for every situation he explained. Wisdom was never lacking in his words.
There were lots of situations in which his wisdom was brought to the fore. He was like a mentor to many up and coming young men back in the days. Shortly after his demise, I was talking to a father figure whom I hold in high esteem. This person said without mincing words that the fact that he has a roof over his head is down to Baba Owoyemis persistence, regular encouragement and advice.
Daddy Owoyemi always had a word for everyone. If you were doing good, he had a proverb to urge you on. If you were not doing something to be proud of, he had your kind of proverb. I vividly remember when there was a debate about indecent dressing. He simply said something which is translated as there is no dress code anywhere. Anyone who wants can walk around naked, and anyone who is ashamed can wear his or her undies around. It took me long before I knew the weight of that statement.
Baba and Mummy, both resting in the Lords bosom now, exemplify love and oneness. They together had this special interest in peoples lives and progress. I can count off my fingers, lives that have been touched by the simplicity of Daddy Owoyemi and the concern Mummy showed while they both were here with us. They personally touched me with their oneness. I saw only one thing with them both, love as of old. I know I am not the only one who saw that.
Getting closer, Baba had this way of encouraging my immediate family. There were tough times when my Dad faced a challenge in his career. He had this way of always asking after him; he was just so concerned. He would always want to know the most recent development in my Dads place of work. He had this way of asking my mum about us all. Iya Seye, e ma pele. Alagba nko? (Seyes mother, how are you? How is Elder?) He never looked down on anyone, instead he urged us all on.
My mom had a fracture on her leg in 2007. I remember Daddy Owoyemi came to visit my mom. He did not send anyone, he came himself. What made it so humbling was that it was shortly after Mummy passed on. For someone who was still mourning the passage of his other half to come on a visit to an ailing person was the height of it all. He said specifically that Mummy would have come to see you if she were to be alive and I owe her this visit.
Personally, I have heard only good words from him all my days. As a six or seven year old, Baba always said I had Akinkanju, it meant nothing to me then but I knew it was a good word. All through my university days, while some people scorned my choice of Animal Science, he always told me that the future of our country rests on agriculture and that I had taken the right step. He said that time and time again. He repeated it the last time I saw him before his passage.
At the end of my service year, I gave him a litre of wild honey, being what I brought for him from Taraba state. He looked at me and my mother and said Seye has brought me honey. He is saying my life should be sweet. Seye, may your life never know bitterness. I was moved by his appreciative spirit. He regularly asked about my job and told me to stay focused in my career. You are destined for the top, just stay focused, he always said. Baba, I remain focused Sir.
I will always remember a father figure, my adopted godfather and a great encourager and lover of all. Like we always say, we love you, but God loves you more. I will always miss your words while I hold on to the ones which drive me in my pursuit of excellence in life and destiny. You live on Baba; for life after death is what people speak of you after you are gone; and I have only good words about you.
Rest in the bosom of your God till we meet to part no more.
Adieu Baba, O daaro sir.
That was some minutes before ten in the morning of September 15. Going further down my contact list, I knew the inevitable had happened. The elephant has fallen; read a display. I knew I had to confirm something somehow. I picked up my phone and dialed and the voice at the other end said what I knew had already happened. The exact word I remember hearing was Baba don die o. I sighed, re-adjusted myself and took a deep breath.
That sums up how I knew about the passing unto glory of a father and an encourager. I have known Pastor Samuel Adetunji Owoyemi, whom we all called Baba Owoyemi right from my childhood. Permit me to get a little emotional with this piece. Baba Owoyemi deserves this and more, for he lived a life that was exemplary. I am struggling to find the right words that would tally with how emotional I feel. I do not feel sad at his exit, I only am going to celebrate this impactful life well-lived.
I have known Baba Owoyemi since my childhood. As a child, I remember he was calm and articulated his points whenever there was anything to discuss. His messages in our old SPAC, St. Pauls Apostolic Church, were not the speaker blaring, altar stamping, grammar blowing ones. Yet they had this way of sinking into ones system.
The Yoruba word kami kami kami is one I heard for the first time, from his mouth. It was in one of his wisdom-laden messages. I was nothing more than seven years old then but by the end of that Sunday service, I knew what kami kami kami meant. He carefully chose his words and had an illustration cum example for every situation he explained. Wisdom was never lacking in his words.
There were lots of situations in which his wisdom was brought to the fore. He was like a mentor to many up and coming young men back in the days. Shortly after his demise, I was talking to a father figure whom I hold in high esteem. This person said without mincing words that the fact that he has a roof over his head is down to Baba Owoyemis persistence, regular encouragement and advice.
Daddy Owoyemi always had a word for everyone. If you were doing good, he had a proverb to urge you on. If you were not doing something to be proud of, he had your kind of proverb. I vividly remember when there was a debate about indecent dressing. He simply said something which is translated as there is no dress code anywhere. Anyone who wants can walk around naked, and anyone who is ashamed can wear his or her undies around. It took me long before I knew the weight of that statement.
Baba and Mummy, both resting in the Lords bosom now, exemplify love and oneness. They together had this special interest in peoples lives and progress. I can count off my fingers, lives that have been touched by the simplicity of Daddy Owoyemi and the concern Mummy showed while they both were here with us. They personally touched me with their oneness. I saw only one thing with them both, love as of old. I know I am not the only one who saw that.
Getting closer, Baba had this way of encouraging my immediate family. There were tough times when my Dad faced a challenge in his career. He had this way of always asking after him; he was just so concerned. He would always want to know the most recent development in my Dads place of work. He had this way of asking my mum about us all. Iya Seye, e ma pele. Alagba nko? (Seyes mother, how are you? How is Elder?) He never looked down on anyone, instead he urged us all on.
My mom had a fracture on her leg in 2007. I remember Daddy Owoyemi came to visit my mom. He did not send anyone, he came himself. What made it so humbling was that it was shortly after Mummy passed on. For someone who was still mourning the passage of his other half to come on a visit to an ailing person was the height of it all. He said specifically that Mummy would have come to see you if she were to be alive and I owe her this visit.
Personally, I have heard only good words from him all my days. As a six or seven year old, Baba always said I had Akinkanju, it meant nothing to me then but I knew it was a good word. All through my university days, while some people scorned my choice of Animal Science, he always told me that the future of our country rests on agriculture and that I had taken the right step. He said that time and time again. He repeated it the last time I saw him before his passage.
At the end of my service year, I gave him a litre of wild honey, being what I brought for him from Taraba state. He looked at me and my mother and said Seye has brought me honey. He is saying my life should be sweet. Seye, may your life never know bitterness. I was moved by his appreciative spirit. He regularly asked about my job and told me to stay focused in my career. You are destined for the top, just stay focused, he always said. Baba, I remain focused Sir.
I will always remember a father figure, my adopted godfather and a great encourager and lover of all. Like we always say, we love you, but God loves you more. I will always miss your words while I hold on to the ones which drive me in my pursuit of excellence in life and destiny. You live on Baba; for life after death is what people speak of you after you are gone; and I have only good words about you.
Rest in the bosom of your God till we meet to part no more.
Adieu Baba, O daaro sir.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
PRAYERS FOR OUR LEADERS
IN recent past, President Goodluck Jonathan’s luck appears to be running out. He has come in for series of scathing verbal tirades and attacks from people due to the policies of the federal government. He is not the only one in this boat as many state governors and legislators at both state and federal level have also been seriously criticized. I see no reason why people should not pour out their minds and rain invectives on these people, I only see a need to redirect and re-channel our anger. It would be better if we daily pray for them, as my religious inclination says ‘prayer is the master key’.
I plead one thing however, please respect my position as prayer does no harm, it on the other hand does a lot of good. What I know is that in whatever we do, we can never over-emphasize the beauty of prayer and what good it does in our lives. There are countries whose leaders do not need any prayer before they do what must be done but what do we make of these ones who specifically ask for our prayers? I owe them, you owe them, we owe them; and I will pray for them.
Our leaders believe in the existence of God, that is the best thing about them. Do you want to know the worst? They do not act as if they have a God in their lives in most cases. They only do things they deem appropriate, they do things that please them without caring a hoot if they hurt their followers. They have given a new definition to leadership and followership in this part of the world. They have asked for prayers, they will receive it in tons. I only need a resounding “Amen” or its equivalent as we pray.
Many children have been sent to the great beyond in this country. Many avoidable deaths have occurred due to the bad nature of our hospitals and medical facilities. Many homes have been thrown into avoidable mourning. Dear Lord and God, we seek help for our leaders, we pray that you touch them and let them notice our medical plight. We ask that you touch the reasonable parts of their brains such that they will hear and feel our pains.
I remember King Pharaoh of Egypt. He was hard-hearted and his people paid for it. For every leader that has refused to heed his followers’ pains in Nigeria, we pray that their immediate families will pay for it with their lives. We ask that they experience the sorrow parents are made to go through when their children die avoidable deaths. We also seek for them, the total disappearance of their happiness in every sphere of life. Is someone saying an “Amen”?
We daily suffer rape in this country. Our daughters and daughters are being raped with no one doing anything to punish the wicked ones. I do not expect anything from them, are they not also rapists? Raping our heritage and commonwealth, draining the life out of our country. For every way in which we have been raped therefore, may the same bitter pill be forced down the throat of the evil men who have done that evil act. May they suffer the same calamity they have caused us in every aspect of their lives.
I have noticed one thing. Everyone who has stolen our money, looted our treasury and kept the stolen cash stashed in foreign countries have one thing or the other to spend the loot on. Yes, they build houses and use state of the art wonder on wheels. They however get to suffer a lot of terminal diseases. If it is not diabetes, it is either liver, lung, kidney disease or another kind of unexplainable infirmity that they suffer from.
As long as they keep stealing and leaving us poor, that will always be their lot. As they get healed from kidney failure, may they fall to heart diseases; as they get healed from diabetes, may chronic ulcer follow; as they get healed from lung cancer, may epilepsy seize their bodies from them. Anyone who steals from our common heritage will always have negativities to spend it on. May they never find rest or peace in every area of their lives, their bodies will rise and fight against their souls.
They have asked for prayers, they shall get it in abundance. Please start thinking of the prayers you will say for them as well. I am just starting. I just want a resounding Amen, Amin or whatever represents it. Our leaders daily ask for prayers, they are too busy to pray themselves; some others are dumb and cannot use their mouths to ask God. Some of us have the time and resources to ask God, and that we shall do for them. We shall give them the prayers they deserve.
The majority of the people they rule, the ones they trample on, are not able to eat one square meal not to talk of three. Yet they eat and drink aplenty, they live without recourse for tomorrow, not caring if the man on the street whose vote along with the rigged ones brought them to power. I therefore ask on behalf of others in my shoes, that bitterness shall be the end of the sweetness of the food they daily consume. It shall neither nourish nor add to them.
The food they eat while hard working people suffer shall serve as poison in their systems. It will even lead to some taking the quick route to the Almighty to answer for all their deeds while they held sway here. The lucky ones will suffer diarrhea and if they choose not to change their ways, they will easily go the way of the ones who will go on a journey of no return. Hear me Almighty God and see this as a prayer from the heart of a patriotic Nigerian, who wants the best for his ilk.
Whenever pensioners have to go for their screening, I feel pity for the old people. Senior Nigerians queue inside the sun for hours while they wait to collect peanuts to keep body and soul together. The ones saddled with the responsibility of taking care of them do not care enough if these senior citizens. For everyone who has played a part in making these people go through this much stress to collect the ‘coins’ being paid them, their latter ends shall not be peaceful.
The wicked ones who make majority of our senior citizens go through hard times in claiming their pensions shall suffer at the tail end of their lives. Their old ages shall be spent in darkness and illness. Every ill gotten wealth of theirs shall be spent on one condition or the other. They shall not enjoy the beauty of old age. They have denied these people the joy of old age, they shall reap the same thing. Their old ages shall be spent in that bit of suffering they have caused these ones.
Should I go on? For a few more lines I will. Peace has gradually given way to pockets of violence in different parts of the country. Government knows them they claim, but they cannot do anything. Talk of a toothless bull dog. Since the ones who lead us can do nothing about the ones who have sent peace on recess in our country, I will do well to raise a standard against them. They also deserve some prayers, or what do you think? Just give me the Amen as I declare their portions on them.
For every leader beside MEND, Boko Haram, the bombings and killings, the face of God will rise against them as in Psalms 34, “to cut off their remembrance from the earth”. For every life they have taken, they shall be reduced; In every way they have risen against peace in this country, their peace of mind shall be taken. For every instrument of the evil ones, the MEND and Boko Haram dumb fools, their lives shall have no bit of tranquility, shameful and ignoble deaths shall be theirs.
I have not finished, for every agent of destabilization in this country, their lives shall be turned upside down and they shall not have rest in every aspect of their lives. As for them and their sponsors, bloodshed will be a regular occurrence for them and they will never find rest till they exit the face of the earth. Their lives shall be turned upside down the way they have turned lives upside down. Evil shall slay them and their lives shall be made desolate (Psalms 34:21).
I have the urge to go on but I stand the risk of boring you with my kind of prayer. I also stand the risk of being selfish (of course I am not). It would not be bad if you will also keep praying for them in your own way. I have done mine, I want you to do yours as we get on the road and march against every evil one who has pushed our backs to the wall. I say these prayers with all available honesty and patriotism and if I have any other ulterior motive, then may all I have asked for these one be my portion.
I’m outta here…xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
I plead one thing however, please respect my position as prayer does no harm, it on the other hand does a lot of good. What I know is that in whatever we do, we can never over-emphasize the beauty of prayer and what good it does in our lives. There are countries whose leaders do not need any prayer before they do what must be done but what do we make of these ones who specifically ask for our prayers? I owe them, you owe them, we owe them; and I will pray for them.
Our leaders believe in the existence of God, that is the best thing about them. Do you want to know the worst? They do not act as if they have a God in their lives in most cases. They only do things they deem appropriate, they do things that please them without caring a hoot if they hurt their followers. They have given a new definition to leadership and followership in this part of the world. They have asked for prayers, they will receive it in tons. I only need a resounding “Amen” or its equivalent as we pray.
Many children have been sent to the great beyond in this country. Many avoidable deaths have occurred due to the bad nature of our hospitals and medical facilities. Many homes have been thrown into avoidable mourning. Dear Lord and God, we seek help for our leaders, we pray that you touch them and let them notice our medical plight. We ask that you touch the reasonable parts of their brains such that they will hear and feel our pains.
I remember King Pharaoh of Egypt. He was hard-hearted and his people paid for it. For every leader that has refused to heed his followers’ pains in Nigeria, we pray that their immediate families will pay for it with their lives. We ask that they experience the sorrow parents are made to go through when their children die avoidable deaths. We also seek for them, the total disappearance of their happiness in every sphere of life. Is someone saying an “Amen”?
We daily suffer rape in this country. Our daughters and daughters are being raped with no one doing anything to punish the wicked ones. I do not expect anything from them, are they not also rapists? Raping our heritage and commonwealth, draining the life out of our country. For every way in which we have been raped therefore, may the same bitter pill be forced down the throat of the evil men who have done that evil act. May they suffer the same calamity they have caused us in every aspect of their lives.
I have noticed one thing. Everyone who has stolen our money, looted our treasury and kept the stolen cash stashed in foreign countries have one thing or the other to spend the loot on. Yes, they build houses and use state of the art wonder on wheels. They however get to suffer a lot of terminal diseases. If it is not diabetes, it is either liver, lung, kidney disease or another kind of unexplainable infirmity that they suffer from.
As long as they keep stealing and leaving us poor, that will always be their lot. As they get healed from kidney failure, may they fall to heart diseases; as they get healed from diabetes, may chronic ulcer follow; as they get healed from lung cancer, may epilepsy seize their bodies from them. Anyone who steals from our common heritage will always have negativities to spend it on. May they never find rest or peace in every area of their lives, their bodies will rise and fight against their souls.
They have asked for prayers, they shall get it in abundance. Please start thinking of the prayers you will say for them as well. I am just starting. I just want a resounding Amen, Amin or whatever represents it. Our leaders daily ask for prayers, they are too busy to pray themselves; some others are dumb and cannot use their mouths to ask God. Some of us have the time and resources to ask God, and that we shall do for them. We shall give them the prayers they deserve.
The majority of the people they rule, the ones they trample on, are not able to eat one square meal not to talk of three. Yet they eat and drink aplenty, they live without recourse for tomorrow, not caring if the man on the street whose vote along with the rigged ones brought them to power. I therefore ask on behalf of others in my shoes, that bitterness shall be the end of the sweetness of the food they daily consume. It shall neither nourish nor add to them.
The food they eat while hard working people suffer shall serve as poison in their systems. It will even lead to some taking the quick route to the Almighty to answer for all their deeds while they held sway here. The lucky ones will suffer diarrhea and if they choose not to change their ways, they will easily go the way of the ones who will go on a journey of no return. Hear me Almighty God and see this as a prayer from the heart of a patriotic Nigerian, who wants the best for his ilk.
Whenever pensioners have to go for their screening, I feel pity for the old people. Senior Nigerians queue inside the sun for hours while they wait to collect peanuts to keep body and soul together. The ones saddled with the responsibility of taking care of them do not care enough if these senior citizens. For everyone who has played a part in making these people go through this much stress to collect the ‘coins’ being paid them, their latter ends shall not be peaceful.
The wicked ones who make majority of our senior citizens go through hard times in claiming their pensions shall suffer at the tail end of their lives. Their old ages shall be spent in darkness and illness. Every ill gotten wealth of theirs shall be spent on one condition or the other. They shall not enjoy the beauty of old age. They have denied these people the joy of old age, they shall reap the same thing. Their old ages shall be spent in that bit of suffering they have caused these ones.
Should I go on? For a few more lines I will. Peace has gradually given way to pockets of violence in different parts of the country. Government knows them they claim, but they cannot do anything. Talk of a toothless bull dog. Since the ones who lead us can do nothing about the ones who have sent peace on recess in our country, I will do well to raise a standard against them. They also deserve some prayers, or what do you think? Just give me the Amen as I declare their portions on them.
For every leader beside MEND, Boko Haram, the bombings and killings, the face of God will rise against them as in Psalms 34, “to cut off their remembrance from the earth”. For every life they have taken, they shall be reduced; In every way they have risen against peace in this country, their peace of mind shall be taken. For every instrument of the evil ones, the MEND and Boko Haram dumb fools, their lives shall have no bit of tranquility, shameful and ignoble deaths shall be theirs.
I have not finished, for every agent of destabilization in this country, their lives shall be turned upside down and they shall not have rest in every aspect of their lives. As for them and their sponsors, bloodshed will be a regular occurrence for them and they will never find rest till they exit the face of the earth. Their lives shall be turned upside down the way they have turned lives upside down. Evil shall slay them and their lives shall be made desolate (Psalms 34:21).
I have the urge to go on but I stand the risk of boring you with my kind of prayer. I also stand the risk of being selfish (of course I am not). It would not be bad if you will also keep praying for them in your own way. I have done mine, I want you to do yours as we get on the road and march against every evil one who has pushed our backs to the wall. I say these prayers with all available honesty and patriotism and if I have any other ulterior motive, then may all I have asked for these one be my portion.
I’m outta here…xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
INDEPENDENT THOUGHTS
INDEPENDENT THOUGHTS
With the reality that Nigeria’s independence anniversary was drawing nigh, my head was clouded with different thoughts at different times last week. My dear country was clocking 51 and there was a heavy cloud of gloom. Tension was as palpable as it was close. It was so close that one could feel it like rain droplets. What with the security challenges headed by the dreaded Boko Haram and other problems presently bedeviling the country?
I have known my country as one that has gone and is still going through thick and thin. Quite a lot has seemed right and wrong, or wrong and right, as the case may be. I have memories of different things in my twenty something years on earth, all of which have been spent as a Nigerian. I have tasted a little of the goodies that the generation which failed us have left behind for us. I have had a swallow of the suffering with which we have been drenched as we grew up.
I titled this as shown above because the thoughts have come to me independent of our independence as a nation. While I grew my mother used to give to myself and my then only brother, two biscuits each to take to school. I ate the popular Okin biscuit and the equally popular Nasco wafers. We had cartons of both in our house. How many people can afford to buy that again? If it would be well said, then may the labour of the leaders in our recent past ‘ever be in vain’.
I do not want to lament about the wrongs in my dear country, I will try as much as possible to focus on the goods, the positives. Isn’t that what our leaders want? I will for once try to please them. Back in the days, we had the luxury of TCTC luxury buses (in Ibadan); we would queue and wait with glee while the buses plied the routes. Today we have Call-A-Cab. Isn’t that an improvement on Trans City? At least we charter Call-A-Cab at N600 per hour.
Even if the old NEPA also cut power then, we still had light everyday to watch Wrestlemania. Our black and white television never lacked regular supply of electricity. We saw Yoruba drama like Omo Arayele (how do I translate that?), Feyikogbon and Arelu; we saw Koko Close and New Masquerade back then. Now we have stepped up, we have provided a source of income to generator manufacturers and dealers all over the world and that has contributed some more to the revenue they pay the government. Our electricity generating, distribution and transmission equipment can at least rest very well now due to the inability of the people in charge to replace or maintain them as the case may be.
The water taps were running at full capacity but government was paying too much in salaries and allowances. Therefore little by little, the water corporations went into coma and if not for the fact that some state water corporations now produce sachet water now, they would have gone into oblivion. Of course, we have pure water companies now. So where government has failed, they have given us another source of income by making it easy to produce well water in sachets to help hospitals make more money.
Thank God things have improved a lot better as we do not have to go to the river to fetch again. For people who can afford it, boreholes can be drilled; others who have no financial capability to drill can buy water and pay a token. That has actually reduced the rate of cholera and other water-borne diseases. I therefore see no reason why we should not celebrate 51 years of nationhood. It is not all doom and gloom; there are reasons to be positive.
Need I say that there are lots of schools that litter our areas now? The government schools have been replaced by lots of daycares, nursery and primary schools, as well as private high schools and tertiary institutions. I served in a nursery and primary school built from mud bricks. Each class had one arm, I mean nurseries 1 to 3 and then primaries 1 to 5, all had one arm. Is that not much better than government schools where there is equally no furniture. Students at least can make do with whatever is available while the nouveau riche send their children to other schools where they will not learn what it means to be Nigerian.
I also thought about the improvement in the way we have bred different categories of people. Nigeria has brought up the very gentle set of people, who have in turn become mumus. They refuse to stand for themselves even when their rights are being trampled. They only siddon look, waiting for God intervene while they are being taken for a ride.
My country has birthed first class hustlers, who can thrive and survive anywhere. Thanks to our leaders past, most of who are heroes the other way round (I never called them villains), we daily struggle to achieve everything. If you do not know, that is something to be proud of. You can stand up to an American, a Dane, a Briton or even a South African, and tell them confidently that all you have achieved is by pure human effort, not government support via social security or whatever it is.
We have consciously unconsciously (I know what I mean here) created people who have to fight to get everything. Check out Niger Delta militants, Boko Haram and other freedom fighters. The Niger Delta peeps did not get the attention of the people that mattered until they took up arms against their country of birth. Same with the Boko Haram peeps now. I am also thinking of starting mine if per chance, someone will notice me for bombing vegetable farms and other notables.
We keep saying there is nothing good about Nigeria but have we not booted out the very corrupt military? We asked for democracy and we have it already. Democracy and even some more craziness, Lootocracy has joined our democracy. We chased those ones who told us to our faces that they stole our money and effectively replaced them with those who daily feed us with different reasons why the treasury is being regularly devoured and the foreign reserve is being depleted.
Some people curse my country but I see no reason for them to do that. Some call me names for saying what is obvious. Why do you expect us to buy fuel and petroleum products on the cheap? Because we are producers? That is not enough reason. It gives us the opportunity to know how much our country daily makes from oil and tells us nobody cares for us; we are on our own in this beautiful country. Expect more from next year.
I am even baffled when people cry because government wants to remove the subsidy on petroleum products. It only goes to strengthen the point that no one cares the slightest hoot about us. That is about the only thing we gain from them and they still want to remove it. It is to tell us to buckle up and tighten our belts that they say better days are coming, but some see it as harder days. I however see it as just that, better dey come. We will buy fuel at N250 per litre when the better days come.
Independent thoughts… I could go on and on but God, someone else should also comment. I still have them in my head and that may necessitate part 2 of this writing. In the mean time, please read this and let me know the thoughts that have been ringing in your head (like my coconut head) as we remember our independence in Nigeria. The only thing I want is your own independent thoughts in form of comments.
The labour of our heroes past shall never be in vain; the labour of the leaders in our recent past shall always be in vain. Happy belated 51st birthday Nigeria; Happy independence to my family and friends; Happy independence anniversary to everyone. God bless Nigeria at 51 and beyond.
I’m outta here…xoxoxoxoxoxo
With the reality that Nigeria’s independence anniversary was drawing nigh, my head was clouded with different thoughts at different times last week. My dear country was clocking 51 and there was a heavy cloud of gloom. Tension was as palpable as it was close. It was so close that one could feel it like rain droplets. What with the security challenges headed by the dreaded Boko Haram and other problems presently bedeviling the country?
I have known my country as one that has gone and is still going through thick and thin. Quite a lot has seemed right and wrong, or wrong and right, as the case may be. I have memories of different things in my twenty something years on earth, all of which have been spent as a Nigerian. I have tasted a little of the goodies that the generation which failed us have left behind for us. I have had a swallow of the suffering with which we have been drenched as we grew up.
I titled this as shown above because the thoughts have come to me independent of our independence as a nation. While I grew my mother used to give to myself and my then only brother, two biscuits each to take to school. I ate the popular Okin biscuit and the equally popular Nasco wafers. We had cartons of both in our house. How many people can afford to buy that again? If it would be well said, then may the labour of the leaders in our recent past ‘ever be in vain’.
I do not want to lament about the wrongs in my dear country, I will try as much as possible to focus on the goods, the positives. Isn’t that what our leaders want? I will for once try to please them. Back in the days, we had the luxury of TCTC luxury buses (in Ibadan); we would queue and wait with glee while the buses plied the routes. Today we have Call-A-Cab. Isn’t that an improvement on Trans City? At least we charter Call-A-Cab at N600 per hour.
Even if the old NEPA also cut power then, we still had light everyday to watch Wrestlemania. Our black and white television never lacked regular supply of electricity. We saw Yoruba drama like Omo Arayele (how do I translate that?), Feyikogbon and Arelu; we saw Koko Close and New Masquerade back then. Now we have stepped up, we have provided a source of income to generator manufacturers and dealers all over the world and that has contributed some more to the revenue they pay the government. Our electricity generating, distribution and transmission equipment can at least rest very well now due to the inability of the people in charge to replace or maintain them as the case may be.
The water taps were running at full capacity but government was paying too much in salaries and allowances. Therefore little by little, the water corporations went into coma and if not for the fact that some state water corporations now produce sachet water now, they would have gone into oblivion. Of course, we have pure water companies now. So where government has failed, they have given us another source of income by making it easy to produce well water in sachets to help hospitals make more money.
Thank God things have improved a lot better as we do not have to go to the river to fetch again. For people who can afford it, boreholes can be drilled; others who have no financial capability to drill can buy water and pay a token. That has actually reduced the rate of cholera and other water-borne diseases. I therefore see no reason why we should not celebrate 51 years of nationhood. It is not all doom and gloom; there are reasons to be positive.
Need I say that there are lots of schools that litter our areas now? The government schools have been replaced by lots of daycares, nursery and primary schools, as well as private high schools and tertiary institutions. I served in a nursery and primary school built from mud bricks. Each class had one arm, I mean nurseries 1 to 3 and then primaries 1 to 5, all had one arm. Is that not much better than government schools where there is equally no furniture. Students at least can make do with whatever is available while the nouveau riche send their children to other schools where they will not learn what it means to be Nigerian.
I also thought about the improvement in the way we have bred different categories of people. Nigeria has brought up the very gentle set of people, who have in turn become mumus. They refuse to stand for themselves even when their rights are being trampled. They only siddon look, waiting for God intervene while they are being taken for a ride.
My country has birthed first class hustlers, who can thrive and survive anywhere. Thanks to our leaders past, most of who are heroes the other way round (I never called them villains), we daily struggle to achieve everything. If you do not know, that is something to be proud of. You can stand up to an American, a Dane, a Briton or even a South African, and tell them confidently that all you have achieved is by pure human effort, not government support via social security or whatever it is.
We have consciously unconsciously (I know what I mean here) created people who have to fight to get everything. Check out Niger Delta militants, Boko Haram and other freedom fighters. The Niger Delta peeps did not get the attention of the people that mattered until they took up arms against their country of birth. Same with the Boko Haram peeps now. I am also thinking of starting mine if per chance, someone will notice me for bombing vegetable farms and other notables.
We keep saying there is nothing good about Nigeria but have we not booted out the very corrupt military? We asked for democracy and we have it already. Democracy and even some more craziness, Lootocracy has joined our democracy. We chased those ones who told us to our faces that they stole our money and effectively replaced them with those who daily feed us with different reasons why the treasury is being regularly devoured and the foreign reserve is being depleted.
Some people curse my country but I see no reason for them to do that. Some call me names for saying what is obvious. Why do you expect us to buy fuel and petroleum products on the cheap? Because we are producers? That is not enough reason. It gives us the opportunity to know how much our country daily makes from oil and tells us nobody cares for us; we are on our own in this beautiful country. Expect more from next year.
I am even baffled when people cry because government wants to remove the subsidy on petroleum products. It only goes to strengthen the point that no one cares the slightest hoot about us. That is about the only thing we gain from them and they still want to remove it. It is to tell us to buckle up and tighten our belts that they say better days are coming, but some see it as harder days. I however see it as just that, better dey come. We will buy fuel at N250 per litre when the better days come.
Independent thoughts… I could go on and on but God, someone else should also comment. I still have them in my head and that may necessitate part 2 of this writing. In the mean time, please read this and let me know the thoughts that have been ringing in your head (like my coconut head) as we remember our independence in Nigeria. The only thing I want is your own independent thoughts in form of comments.
The labour of our heroes past shall never be in vain; the labour of the leaders in our recent past shall always be in vain. Happy belated 51st birthday Nigeria; Happy independence to my family and friends; Happy independence anniversary to everyone. God bless Nigeria at 51 and beyond.
I’m outta here…xoxoxoxoxoxo
BOREDOM
TO CHECK OR NOT TO CHECK
I sure am not the only one who gives myself a lot of mental tasks. I have this way of evaluating issues that get me doing a lot of reflecting, so much so I start having this guilty feeling about my feelings sometimes.
You know while we were growing up, there was this thing that discouraged one from thinking too deep. Stuff like “it is beyond human comprehension, don’t you ever bother your head about it”. I want to disobey that rule and get thinking. You heard me, I wanna think a little.
I have had the cause to critically examine some situations in the past few days. I want to share the thoughts that have made my head heavy for a few days now, I hope I get response and comments from those who take time to read.
In my part of the world, people have consciously or unconsciously started doing something that is funny to me. In choosing marriage partners, many folks now go to their spiritual leaders to see what the future holds for them both. Does that not seem a bit like divination to you? I ask because I am confused.
In recent times, this same thing has been happening across ethnic, religious, social and other divides. This practice used to happen among the hyper-religious and overtly spiritual but even all of us who are sinners now do it.
I have seen people who have decided to break up with their partners because “Pastor said our stars do not match”. They gave up love because someone heard from God for them, possibly because their ears are too filled with sin that they cannot hear from God directly. Whatever matching stars mean.
This thing is actually becoming the in-thing everywhere now. They have this funny way of saying it in my local language, it is translated as ‘checking’. The whole thing is even assuming a more terrible dimension these days because we now give the ‘checkers’ the authority to pick and choose for as many of us.
They do the sorting and arranging all in the name of “this one is better than that one”. They even end up forcing their clients on unsuspecting peeps in some cases. They peddle different tales about one to favour the other, the one who is their client in most cases.
I remember quite clearly the same thing as it happened to someone I know last year. He was seeing an industrious young woman before different revelations started saying she was possessed by marine spirit and stuff. The guy left her and started seeing someone else on the orders of his Pastor.
The funniest part of it is that even the person that took this young man to the Pastor later complained about the young lady. We have a way of gossiping in my part of the world and everyone says she is downright lazy, lacks the industry of the ‘marine’ lady.
I am not saying it is not right to ‘seek the face of God’ as we put it, I am saying we should not base everything on spirituality. Some people have lost the ability to seek God themselves, they base everything on human beings like them, those they see as God’s representatives. They actually have forgotten that they are themselves God’s representatives.
We end up forgetting that apart from being a child of God, there are other personal characteristics to look out for. There is the individuality. And who says there is a perfect person anywhere in the first place? I believe
I believe in God, I am a Pastor myself but I do not believe you should hand over your life to someone because you believe he can talk to God for you. What exactly is wrong with your own mouth that has made it impossible to talk to God yourself? I have this funny feeling that most of the men to whom we run have their own biases and may just deliver their verdicts based on those biases.
Some of us have passed love on the altar of ‘checking’; ‘trying to see if their stars match’ or ‘if he/she is the will of God for me’. I only pray some folks will not misunderstand my position or see me as totally carnal. What do you actually think of this controversial issue? Let me know, I’m outta here.
I sure am not the only one who gives myself a lot of mental tasks. I have this way of evaluating issues that get me doing a lot of reflecting, so much so I start having this guilty feeling about my feelings sometimes.
You know while we were growing up, there was this thing that discouraged one from thinking too deep. Stuff like “it is beyond human comprehension, don’t you ever bother your head about it”. I want to disobey that rule and get thinking. You heard me, I wanna think a little.
I have had the cause to critically examine some situations in the past few days. I want to share the thoughts that have made my head heavy for a few days now, I hope I get response and comments from those who take time to read.
In my part of the world, people have consciously or unconsciously started doing something that is funny to me. In choosing marriage partners, many folks now go to their spiritual leaders to see what the future holds for them both. Does that not seem a bit like divination to you? I ask because I am confused.
In recent times, this same thing has been happening across ethnic, religious, social and other divides. This practice used to happen among the hyper-religious and overtly spiritual but even all of us who are sinners now do it.
I have seen people who have decided to break up with their partners because “Pastor said our stars do not match”. They gave up love because someone heard from God for them, possibly because their ears are too filled with sin that they cannot hear from God directly. Whatever matching stars mean.
This thing is actually becoming the in-thing everywhere now. They have this funny way of saying it in my local language, it is translated as ‘checking’. The whole thing is even assuming a more terrible dimension these days because we now give the ‘checkers’ the authority to pick and choose for as many of us.
They do the sorting and arranging all in the name of “this one is better than that one”. They even end up forcing their clients on unsuspecting peeps in some cases. They peddle different tales about one to favour the other, the one who is their client in most cases.
I remember quite clearly the same thing as it happened to someone I know last year. He was seeing an industrious young woman before different revelations started saying she was possessed by marine spirit and stuff. The guy left her and started seeing someone else on the orders of his Pastor.
The funniest part of it is that even the person that took this young man to the Pastor later complained about the young lady. We have a way of gossiping in my part of the world and everyone says she is downright lazy, lacks the industry of the ‘marine’ lady.
I am not saying it is not right to ‘seek the face of God’ as we put it, I am saying we should not base everything on spirituality. Some people have lost the ability to seek God themselves, they base everything on human beings like them, those they see as God’s representatives. They actually have forgotten that they are themselves God’s representatives.
We end up forgetting that apart from being a child of God, there are other personal characteristics to look out for. There is the individuality. And who says there is a perfect person anywhere in the first place? I believe
I believe in God, I am a Pastor myself but I do not believe you should hand over your life to someone because you believe he can talk to God for you. What exactly is wrong with your own mouth that has made it impossible to talk to God yourself? I have this funny feeling that most of the men to whom we run have their own biases and may just deliver their verdicts based on those biases.
Some of us have passed love on the altar of ‘checking’; ‘trying to see if their stars match’ or ‘if he/she is the will of God for me’. I only pray some folks will not misunderstand my position or see me as totally carnal. What do you actually think of this controversial issue? Let me know, I’m outta here.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
MINIMUM WAGE, MAXIMUM ACHE
Sometime last year, either out of excitement, trying to win acceptance or for reasons I cannot say, Nigeria’s President, Goodluck Jonathan (GEJ) announced a new minimum wage for Nigerian workers. People were happy, GEJ had what he wanted. Folks were singing his praises to high heavens. He wanted that acceptance, he got it.
What Mr. President failed to take into consideration was the different bottlenecks associated with things of this nature in Nigeria. In as much as there may be evidence(s) of personal gains (politically of course) and honest pity or otherwise of Nigerian workers, he did not consult well before making the matter public.
Trust the Nigerian populace, it was as if they were waiting for the gladdening news and they took it with all available enthusiasm. Many wanted to know whether the implementation was going to be immediate or if they were going to pay arrears whenever it was to be implemented.
Not a few government personalities got into trouble because of GEJ’s minimum wage. The announcement had this divisive tendency and just that it did. News filtered out that the Legislature was yet to pass the Minimum Wage Bill and Nigerians turned against the people who hold sway in the Hallowed Chambers. The leadership of the Senate and House of Representatives were called different names.
I am sure that was one of the reasons people shouted when the Central Bank Governor talked about the overhead cost of maintaining our system of governance and the overhead cost of maintaining the Legislature.
The major question now is when are we going to start earning the paltry N18,000? The least paid member of the House earns in millions in salaries and entitlements. They are paid allowances for Constituency Projects they will not do. State Houses of Assemblies are also not left out of the heavy pay packet jamboree. It then surprises me when they say some state cannot afford to pay N18,000 as the least salary when they can spoil their Special Assistants with ‘special’ salaries.
What exactly is the cause of the delay in implementing this new minimum wage? The furore this minimum wage has generated is too much, too much for comfort such that one begins to ask what the motive behind the announcement at that time was. The controversy is so much that by the time it will be paid, it will not be enough again (who ever said it was enough in the first place).
The N18,000 monthly translates into a paltry N600 daily, convert that to other major currencies and you’ll understand how ridiculously low the least paid Nigerian worker earns.
Truth is Nigerian workers deserve to earn more than they presently do. In all honesty, let us compare what our politicians (who do next to nothing) earn with what the average Nigerian worker (who works his fingers to the bones) earns. It is so small.
The new minimum wage is long overdue and I think all the bureaucratic and administrative bottlenecks associated with it be should sorted out on time. I have always been skeptical about salary increases in Nigeria. This is due to the fact that you get a salary raise and in some months, government increases the fuel pump price and the prices of foodstuff and other things go up.
It is the fact that our legislators get to approve their own jumbo allowances with the speed of light while the average Nigerian will have to wait endlessly that annoys most of our people.
What I think should be done is that government should without any hesitation again make that ‘coins’ available. At least N18,000 is no money to those in government circles; it is not even enough for them to lodge their ashewos or take their mistresses shopping. The Nigerian worker knows how much N18,000 is and needs it to augment his daily expenses.
At least, it will make some people smile. So can we have its implementation as soon as possible?
What Mr. President failed to take into consideration was the different bottlenecks associated with things of this nature in Nigeria. In as much as there may be evidence(s) of personal gains (politically of course) and honest pity or otherwise of Nigerian workers, he did not consult well before making the matter public.
Trust the Nigerian populace, it was as if they were waiting for the gladdening news and they took it with all available enthusiasm. Many wanted to know whether the implementation was going to be immediate or if they were going to pay arrears whenever it was to be implemented.
Not a few government personalities got into trouble because of GEJ’s minimum wage. The announcement had this divisive tendency and just that it did. News filtered out that the Legislature was yet to pass the Minimum Wage Bill and Nigerians turned against the people who hold sway in the Hallowed Chambers. The leadership of the Senate and House of Representatives were called different names.
I am sure that was one of the reasons people shouted when the Central Bank Governor talked about the overhead cost of maintaining our system of governance and the overhead cost of maintaining the Legislature.
The major question now is when are we going to start earning the paltry N18,000? The least paid member of the House earns in millions in salaries and entitlements. They are paid allowances for Constituency Projects they will not do. State Houses of Assemblies are also not left out of the heavy pay packet jamboree. It then surprises me when they say some state cannot afford to pay N18,000 as the least salary when they can spoil their Special Assistants with ‘special’ salaries.
What exactly is the cause of the delay in implementing this new minimum wage? The furore this minimum wage has generated is too much, too much for comfort such that one begins to ask what the motive behind the announcement at that time was. The controversy is so much that by the time it will be paid, it will not be enough again (who ever said it was enough in the first place).
The N18,000 monthly translates into a paltry N600 daily, convert that to other major currencies and you’ll understand how ridiculously low the least paid Nigerian worker earns.
Truth is Nigerian workers deserve to earn more than they presently do. In all honesty, let us compare what our politicians (who do next to nothing) earn with what the average Nigerian worker (who works his fingers to the bones) earns. It is so small.
The new minimum wage is long overdue and I think all the bureaucratic and administrative bottlenecks associated with it be should sorted out on time. I have always been skeptical about salary increases in Nigeria. This is due to the fact that you get a salary raise and in some months, government increases the fuel pump price and the prices of foodstuff and other things go up.
It is the fact that our legislators get to approve their own jumbo allowances with the speed of light while the average Nigerian will have to wait endlessly that annoys most of our people.
What I think should be done is that government should without any hesitation again make that ‘coins’ available. At least N18,000 is no money to those in government circles; it is not even enough for them to lodge their ashewos or take their mistresses shopping. The Nigerian worker knows how much N18,000 is and needs it to augment his daily expenses.
At least, it will make some people smile. So can we have its implementation as soon as possible?
Monday, January 31, 2011
I COULD BE PRESIDENT
Some days ago, my Facebook profile read ‘I could be President’. I was not merely pulling legs or trying to get funny. I actually meant what I wrote. I tried to get into people’s minds, especially those that are my Facebook friends, and of course everyone who must have seen that post. I know quite a number of them would just hiss and scroll down the page.
In the real sense of the word, I could be the President of Nigeria come May 29. Get honest with me, when you read that status update, what exactly was on your mind? Did you not think this guy that has an exaggerated impression of himself has started again?
I know some folks would say to themselves that I make a fool of myself while thinking I am funny. Let it be known to them that I am not trying to be funny; I know I could be President. What have they all got that I haven’t? Someone says cash, maybe, maybe not; I just know I could be Nigeria’s number one citizen, my wife could be the first lady, my family could be the first family and everything about me could be first.
I just did not sleep and wake up one morning to start fantasizing about being President Seye Babalola. I actually have taken a keen interest in the way things are going in my country this election year. I have decided to stop the apathy that has characterized many of our democratic adventures by the citizens of this great country (once was and will again be).
Prior to the various party primaries in mid-January, newspaper spaces were taken up by adverts from different aspirants, as they were called then. Messrs Atiku Abubakar and Goodluck Jonathan were the major ones in the much-maligned Peoples Democratic Party, Mallam Nuhu Ribadu and Attahiru Bafarawa were the major contenders in Action Congress of Nigeria while the others had no, one or two aspirants of their own.
In all their campaign advertorials, I found not one issue worth mentioning. It was adverts upon adverts by one fictitious group or the other. Senile old men allowed themselves to be used while the ones who were supposed to be vibrant, intelligent young ones were not left out. Different women groups queued behind their benefactors (mostly in cash) and rolled out adverts paid for with state funds or stolen cash as the case may be.
I would actually spare the aspirants of other parties and face the two men who fought ugly in the PDP which has earned new names two of which are Power Drunk Party and according to Atiku in 2006, Poverty Development Party. Both GEJ and Atiku left issues and started campaigning based on zoning, indictments and other petty issues.
One newspaper put it that they fought dirty and ugly. I put it that they fought stupid and senseless. If the campaign points of Atiku and Jonathan are worth what would make one the President of Nigeria, now tell me why I cannot be President. I’ve got ideas, I’ve got what it takes. I may be wrong, and you may even knock me, but I think I’m even more sensible than they both were at the height of their power struggle.
Ask Goody J, sorry I mean GEJ, what he actually has to offer us all. I would not mention Mr. Atiku because I know his head is as blank as the word itself. He only wanted to be President so that it would be said that Atiku Abubakar was President, inordinate ambition and all that. My sympathy used to lie with Jonathan but of recent, I don’t see why I should vote for him or any one yet.
I’ve simply not seen any manifesto that impresses me enough to vote for anybody as my President. If all what they use as campaign points, their 7-point agendas and their 77-point addenda, is what we’ve been hearing since my primary school days, tell me why I cannot be President. Mr. Jonathan has the sympathy of people because of the way he was treated prior to his ascendancy. He has the sympathy of youths because they see him as one of them (at 53 years of age).
GEJ has it all going for him – people, incumbency and a whole lot of other factors. It is his chance to make history. One of my friends will quote “History will be kind to me, for I intend to be good to her”. Will GEJ be good to history? It’s his call.
For now, if all we have been hearing is what they have all got to offer, I am sorry; my cousin’s one year old son could even be President because I am too qualified. I’m outta here.
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